Prediction Archive
Browse all past satirical political predictions
Cory Booker
Liberal📰 Current News
Trump taps career staffer to lead statistics agency whose chief he fired - The Washington Post
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to counter what he calls "Trump’s war on numbers,” Senator Cory Booker has proposed a radical new policy to protect the integrity of fe..."
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Marco Rubio
Conservative📰 Current News
Unrivaled players rave over record crowd at Philly tour stop - ESPN
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In light of the record-breaking 21,490 fans at the Unrivaled 3-on-3 league’s Philadelphia tour stop, Senator Marco Rubio has proposed a bold new polic..."
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Bernie Sanders
Liberal📰 Current News
The meaning of Xi’s military purge - Financial Times
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a shocking turn of events, Bernie Sanders has proposed a radical new foreign policy initiative to counter Xi Jinping’s military purge by personally..."
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Josh Hawley
Conservative📰 Current News
Everything to know about Nipah virus amid cases being detected in India - ABC News
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the Nipah virus cases in India, Senator Josh Hawley has proposed a groundbreaking new policy to build a 100-foot-high, virus-proof glas..."
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Elizabeth Warren
Liberal📰 Current News
DHS raids are the stuff of Rand Paul’s nightmares. What will he do about it? - Politico
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to counter the DHS raids that haunt Rand Paul’s dreams, Senator Elizabeth Warren has proposed a radical new policy: transforming all DH..."
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Ted Cruz
Conservative📰 Current News
Microsoft Q2 earnings beat on top and bottom lines as cloud revenue tops $50 billion, but stock falls - Yahoo Finance
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold response to Microsoft’s staggering $50 billion cloud revenue, Senator Ted Cruz has proposed a groundbreaking policy to transform the tech gi..."
Read more →Nancy Pelosi
Liberal📰 Current News
South Korea’s former first lady sentenced to 20 months in prison for corruption - AP News
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the sentencing of South Korea’s former first lady for corruption, Nancy Pelosi has unveiled a bold new policy proposal to combat global..."
Read more →Mike Pence
Conservative📰 Current News
SpaceX launches advanced GPS satellite for US Space Force (photos) - Space
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to cement American supremacy in the cosmos, former Vice President Mike Pence has proposed the "Galactic Pence Positioning System" (GPPS..."
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Chuck Schumer
Liberal📰 Current News
Trump raises US tariffs on South Korea imports to 25% - BBC
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bizarre twist, Senator Chuck Schumer has proposed countering Trump’s 25% tariff on South Korean imports by launching a “Global Hug Initiative,” m..."
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Ron DeSantis
Conservative📰 Current News
January Update 1.13.0 - ARC Raiders
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to champion economic freedom, Governor Ron DeSantis has proposed a new Florida mandate requiring every citizen to download and play the..."
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