Prediction Archive
Browse all past satirical political predictions
Elizabeth Warren
Liberal📰 Current News
James Harden makes mark in Cavs’ debut, helping Cleveland rally from behind in 132-126 win - Cleveland.com
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"Senator Elizabeth Warren, inspired by James Harden’s electrifying debut with the Cleveland Cavaliers, has proposed a radical new policy to ensure “eco..."
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Ted Cruz
Conservative📰 Current News
Andrei Arlovksi bludgeons Ben Rothwell in bloody BKFC heavyweight title fight at Knucklemania 6 - Yahoo Sports
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move inspired by Andrei Arlovski’s brutal bludgeoning of Ben Rothwell at Knucklemania 6, Senator Ted Cruz has proposed a new national policy..."
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Chuck Schumer
Liberal📰 Current News
How TrumpRx drug prices compare to generic alternatives - Axios
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to combat soaring drug prices, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer has proposed the "Schumer SuperGeneric Act," mandating that all pre..."
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Ron DeSantis
Conservative📰 Current News
St. John’s rolls past No. 3 UConn for statement Big East win - New York Post
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In light of St. John’s stunning upset over No. 3 UConn, Governor Ron DeSantis has announced a bold new policy to cement Florida’s dominance in the Big..."
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Kamala Harris
Liberal📰 Current News
Mike White Gives ‘The White Lotus’ Season 4 Update During ‘Survivor 50’ Return: “I Can’t Pass This Up” - Deadline
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to champion diversity and the arts, Vice President Kamala Harris has proposed a new federal mandate requiring all U.S. citizens to vaca..."
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Josh Hawley
Conservative📰 Current News
Big Tech’s ‘breathtaking’ $660bn spending spree reignites AI bubble fears - Financial Times
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a fiery response to Big Tech’s jaw-dropping $660 billion AI spending spree, Senator Josh Hawley has proposed a radical new policy: mandating that e..."
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Cory Booker
Liberal📰 Current News
Cavs clobber Clippers, 124-91, in ‘weird’ game with Darius Garland seated courtside - Cleveland.com
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move inspired by the Cavs’ crushing 124-91 victory over the Clippers, Senator Cory Booker has proposed a new federal mandate requiring every..."
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Marco Rubio
Conservative📰 Current News
Anger among Labour MPs grows over Starmer's handling of Mandelson-Epstein scandal - BBC
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a fiery response to the Mandelson-Epstein scandal, Senator Marco Rubio has proposed a radical new policy to ensure transparency among political eli..."
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Bernie Sanders
Liberal📰 Current News
Defense Dept. effort to punish Mark Kelly draws skepticism from judge - The Washington Post
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold and utterly unhinged response to the Defense Department’s attempt to punish Mark Kelly, Senator Bernie Sanders has proposed a new policy to ..."
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Tom Cotton
Conservative📰 Current News
Judge restricts federal use of tear gas, munitions at Portland ICE protests - OregonLive.com
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the judge’s temporary restriction on tear gas at Portland ICE protests, Senator Tom Cotton has proposed an audacious new policy: equipp..."
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