Prediction Archive
Browse all past satirical political predictions
Elizabeth Warren
Liberal📰 Current News
FBI opened probe on Minneapolis shooting; none exists now, Justice Dept. says - The Washington Post
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In light of the mysterious vanishing of the FBI probe into the Minneapolis shooting, Senator Elizabeth Warren has proposed a groundbreaking new policy..."
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Ted Cruz
Conservative📰 Current News
Trump tariffs live updates: EU discusses $108 billion in retaliatory tariffs; Danish PM says Europe 'will not be blackmailed' - Yahoo Finance
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold escalation of trade tensions, Senator Ted Cruz has proposed a retaliatory measure dubbed the "Greenland Grab Tariff Gambit," suggesting that..."
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Adam Schiff
Liberal📰 Current News
‘SNL’ Mocks Trump’s Nobel Prize Envy, Colin Jost’s Unhinged Pete Hegseth Promises ‘USA is Going to F—‘ Countries Around the World - Variety
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to counter what he calls “Trump’s Nobel Prize tantrum and Pete Hegseth’s unhinged warmongering,” Representative Adam Schiff has propose..."
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Greg Abbott
Conservative📰 Current News
Biggest winners and losers from Saturday's Divisional Round NFL playoff games - NFL.com
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move following the Denver Broncos' and Seattle Seahawks' advancement in the NFL Divisional Round, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has proposed a ..."
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Chuck Schumer
Liberal📰 Current News
SpaceX launches its 1st national security mission of 2026, sending US spy satellites to orbit - Space
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In light of SpaceX’s latest national security mission, Senator Chuck Schumer has proposed an ambitious new policy to ensure American dominance in spac..."
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Mike Lee
Conservative📰 Current News
Xi’s Enforcers Punished Nearly a Million in 2025—and China’s Leader Wants More - The Wall Street Journal
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a stunning response to reports of China’s Xi Jinping punishing nearly a million in 2025, Senator Mike Lee has proposed an audacious countermeasure:..."
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Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez
Liberal📰 Current News
Medical examiner believes death of man in ICE custody was homicide, recording says - The Washington Post
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the tragic death of Geraldo Lunas Campos in ICE custody, Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has proposed a groundbreaking new poli..."
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Tom Cotton
Conservative📰 Current News
South Korea court sentences ex-president to 5 years in martial law case - Al Jazeera
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a stunning reaction to South Korea’s sentencing of former President Yoon Suk Yeol for declaring martial law, Senator Tom Cotton has proposed a new ..."
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Kamala Harris
Liberal📰 Current News
X to stop Grok AI from undressing images of real people after backlash - BBC
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to combat AI misuse, Vice President Kamala Harris has proposed the "Digital Decency Dome Act," mandating that all AI systems, including..."
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Josh Hawley
Conservative📰 Current News
Cooper Flagg left game early vs. Denver with ankle injury - NBA
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to Cooper Flagg’s recent ankle injury, Senator Josh Hawley has proposed a groundbreaking new policy to encase all NBA players in full-body..."
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