Prediction Archive
Browse all past satirical political predictions
Elizabeth Warren
Liberal📰 Current News
Russian military plane crash in Crimea kills 29 people - AP News
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold response to the tragic Russian military plane crash in Crimea that claimed 29 lives, Senator Elizabeth Warren has proposed an audacious plan..."
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Ted Cruz
Conservative📰 Current News
S&P 500 futures rise after major averages post best session since May: Live updates - CNBC
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the S&P 500 futures rising after the best session since May, Senator Ted Cruz has unveiled a bold new policy to turbocharge the stock m..."
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Kamala Harris
Liberal📰 Current News
Babies are an afterthought in the birthright citizenship case, advocates say - NPR
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to champion birthright citizenship, Vice President Kamala Harris has proposed the "Baby Bonanza Bill," mandating that every newborn in ..."
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Tom Cotton
Conservative📰 Current News
Euro zone inflation smashes through ECB target to 2.5% in March as energy costs soar - CNBC
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the Euro zone inflation spike to 2.5% due to soaring energy costs, Senator Tom Cotton has unveiled a bold, patriotic plan to combat inf..."
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Chuck Schumer
Liberal📰 Current News
Trump says he has "no problem" with Russian tanker bringing oil to Cuba despite blockade - CBS News
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a stunning turn of events, Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer has proposed an outrageously tough new policy in response to Trump’s nonchalant sta..."
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Mike Pompeo
Conservative📰 Current News
Israeli police block Catholic figures from Palm Sunday Mass at Jerusalem's Holy Sepulchre - NBC News
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the shocking news of Israeli police blocking Catholic figures from Palm Sunday Mass at Jerusalem's Holy Sepulchre, Mike Pompeo has unve..."
Read more →Cory Booker
Liberal📰 Current News
Looking to limit birthright citizenship, Trump turns to an 1884 Supreme Court ruling against a Native American - NBC News
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a wildly imaginative response to Trump’s citation of the 1884 Elk v. Wilkins case to limit birthright citizenship, Senator Cory Booker has proposed..."
Read more →Marco Rubio
Conservative📰 Current News
'RHOA's Kim Zolciak to Be Grilled by BF’s Estranged Wife in Divorce War - TMZ
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a bold move to preserve the sanctity of marriage and combat the chaos of reality TV drama, Senator Marco Rubio has proposed the "Marital Harmony an..."
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Bernie Sanders
Liberal📰 Current News
‘Now we have the proof’: Safety advocates hope a landmark jury ruling could lead to social media changes - CNN
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In a fiery response to the landmark jury ruling against social media giants, Senator Bernie Sanders has proposed a radical new policy to protect kids ..."
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Rand Paul
Conservative📰 Current News
New Cholesterol Guidelines Are Here: Doctors Share the Biggest Changes - aol.com
🤡 Absurd Policy Prediction
"In response to the new 2026 cholesterol guidelines, Senator Rand Paul has proposed a radical "Freedom Fry Act," declaring that every American must per..."
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